How to Give a Hickey

A hickey, or love bite, is the mark you leave when you aggressively kiss or suck your partner’s skin during sexual foreplay. In some cases it is an accidental mark left in the heat of passion, but in many cases it is done deliberately to mark the person or the experience as one’s own. Learn how to give a hickey properly.

How Does a Hickey Form?

how to give a hickey

Making out can lead to hickeys, or love bites.

A hickey occurs when you suck so hard on your partner’s skin that the tiny blood vessels below the surface of his skin break. They then spill their blood into the surrounding skin tissue towards the skin’s surface. At the beginning the mark is red, like blood, after which it turns purple, blue, and green as the spilled blood cells degrade, die, and are converted to substances that your body can remove.

This is exactly how any bruise generic bupropion hcl xl reviews on your skin forms. The only difference is that sucking the skin produces pressure that can break only the smallest blood vessels (called capillaries) just below the skin’s surface, while hard bumps normally break the blood vessels that are larger and situated deeper. That is why hickeys are smaller and not as dark as large bruises.

The Caveats

Before giving a hicky, make sure that your partner does not have hemophilia, leukemia, any other condition that hinders blood clotting, or liver disease. The liver produces a couple of proteins needed for blood clotting. They will bleed too much from the broken capillaries and your hickey will end up causing serious inflammation and a bruise that stretches across whole limbs. This is not fun, it’s cruel.

Like you would not introduce new sexual activities without discussing it first, it is best to ask your partner whether it is acceptable to leave marks. The chances good that most people do not mind marks, but they may have a preference for where you are allowed to leave them, especially if they have jobs where it would be inappropriate walk around with sexual play marks. It is not necessary to spoil the romantic moment by having this conversation once the make out session has started. You can do it beforehand.

If you want to use teeth, go ahead. Just remember that open wounds are much more likely to become infected than bruises in which the skin is not broken, and sucking someone’s blood into your mouth is a potential HIV risk. It will also be hard for your partner to pretend that teeth marks were caused by, for example, a flying golf ball or a fight with a burglar, as he might be able to do with only a bruise. Even dog teeth do not look the same. If you do not break the skin, all you will be doing with your teeth is to cause friction that will redden his skin.

If you want to give regular hickeys, try to vary your spots of choice. Repeatedly breaking the same capillaries may weaken them over time.

Both the male and the female partner can give hickeys. In this article I have picked the male pronoun for the partner primarily because I am female.

How to Give a Hickey


People will often hide a hickey with clothes.

To give a hickey that will be appreciated, do the following:

  1. Pick a good spot. You are looking for skin that is soft and thin so that a small amount of suction can damage the capillaries. The skin on the throat, the sides of the neck, the fold between the neck and shoulder, the crook of the elbow, around the armpit, and the inside of the thighs can work.
  2. Match the hickey’s location with the type of clothes he wears. Most people want to hide hickeys at least some of the time. If he often wears shirts with collars, the spot where his neck joins his shoulder is ideal. If he likes wearing sweaters or jerseys with high necks, you can have a go at his throat as well. If he is the t-shirt type, the soft skin around his armpit is ideal.
  3. Pick your time well. Latching onto your partner with your mouth and sucking a piece of his skin like an octopus will probably be unwelcome before he is aroused. It is best served between the starter and the main dish when the passion has already built up.
  4. Open your mouth slightly and round it into an O shape. Press your mouth hard on your partner’s skin so that no air can escape between your lips and his skin. Then suck as hard as you can.
  5. Because different people’s skin densities very, it is difficult to make a rule, but 20 to 30 seconds of sucking should be enough. Start with 20 seconds and, if that does not produce a hickey, try 30 seconds on the next occasion you are intimate.
  6. While sucking, work hard to swallow your saliva to avoid slobbering on him like a dog over his dinner.
  7. Use your tongue to make circles on his skin for extra sensation.
  8. If it seems too strange to suck on one spot for 30 seconds, break it up into two sessions.
  9. To wrap it up, kiss the spot gently. You have just heard him a bit, after all, and that spot is now sensitive.

Does a Hicky Hurt?

Revitol Eye Cream

Revitol is a great solution for hickeys.

A hickey is a bruise, so it hurts a bit. When the blood enters your skin tissue from the broken capillaries, it puts pressure on the nerve endings in your skin. But it does not damage the tissue, and is therefore nowhere near as painful as the bruises you get when you bump into things.

When Does the Hickey Appear and Fade?

When the capillaries are damaged, it does not result in a sudden torrent of blood. The blood escapes slowly and collects in the skin tissue over a few minute s, just like with any bruise. So don’t expect to see anything for at least 15 minutes, and possibly even longer. It is, accordingly, important not to go on sucking until your see the mark appears. 15 minutes of pressure can result in a big bruise that is inflamed and painful. You will simply have to be patient and start with a 20 second trial and add ten seconds the next time when you are intimate. You will figure it out over time.

Our skins and immune systems modafinil side effects differ, which makes it impossible to give a recovery time that applies universally. Because it is a small bruise, it should clear up in the first two weeks. Most people would probably not have to wait that long. A hickey stops showing when the blood around the broken capillaries clot to stop the bleeding, and when your body clears the blood out of your skin tissue. You can accelerate the process with Revitol Eye Cream, which contains plenty of ingredients to help your skin expel the blood cells.

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